Blind
by hacim09
Summary: It's the day before James is getting married, and not to Lily! Lily is meanwhile struggling to confess her true feelings to James through a letter. Summary sucks. But please read, and review! Thanks!


**A/N: This just popped into my head. Another one of those crazy ideas I got from riding my bike around the neighborhood. But just to clear some things up, so you don't get completely confused, Lily is using Quick Quill Notes, so she is saying these things and the quill is writing them. That's why there are some things that are written as if they were spoken. And the dotted lines afterwards, are her comments on the letters, like she's reading over them. Okay, I'll let you read the story now!**

-Dear James…no!... Too…too formal!

-James, I'm sorry for being a complete jerk…nah.

-James, I'm sorry for being so blind. See I didn't know that I was in love with you until well, you decided to get married!... Er! That was horrible!

-James, I love you…. Oh my god, I sound like one of those completely obsessed fan girls!

-James, you can't marry Stacey. She's horrible, she doesn't understand you, and I think she's trying to kill you!...I wish she was! Why does she have to be so…so…so perfect?

-James, I know I said that I hate you, but I was wrong! Okay, I'm admitting that I was wrong, so why are you going to get married to a valley girl? You know she'll start crying if you take her up on a broom!...True, but probably not good to insult the fiancée!

-James, quit being a lunatic, and marry me!...because that doesn't sound desperate at all! Oh this is no use! He's going to marry her, and I'm going to be the old maid, who lives with 76 cats, and is going to be found dead, and the only way their going to find me, is that the cats are meowing to loud because they haven't been fed! Oh god, oh god! Maybe this isn't such a good idea…

An hour and a half later….

James, You're an idiot for marrying her!!!...think Lily, think, how is this going to do you any good? Just admit your feelings, and be done with it! You can do this. Worst comes to worst, you'll get very drunk, and live a very lonely life. Yeah that's not so bad! I can be the old maid, who's toothless and everyone's afraid of! Kids will come to my house, and graffiti it!

-James, Did you ever know that I love you? Yup, I sure freakin' do! Isn't that wonderful? Sorry it took me so long to admit it. I was just afraid, and blind, and well, a bit of an arse really…hmm. That wasn't so bad…

-James

I was blind. Blind of who you were. Blind of the person who was right in front of me all these years. And most of all, I was blind of my own feelings. I thought that by passing judgment after judgment that it would make my feelings disappear, trying to make myself think that you were the bad guy I wanted you to be. I called you a prat, a jerk, arrogant, selfish, obnoxious and so many other insults. But I wish I could take them all back. I wish that I could go back in time and stop myself from saying those heartless things. I tried to make you into the villain and you weren't. Instead I was. I imagined myself as the good girl who was trying to turn you into something you already were. But I wasn't. I was the stubborn, obnoxious, proud, vain prat. I was the one who was arrogant. To think that I thought that I was above you. But in the end I couldn't escape my feelings. The feelings that I have for you. Because the truth is after every single time you asked me out, I thought about saying yes. And what would happen. But I always pushed those thoughts away, telling myself that you were the jerk that I wanted you to be. And then you started to really be kind and caring. You started to really shape up. You didn't pull pranks. You worked really hard. You even started to beat me and Remeus! And this made me think even more. What if I said yes? What would happen? But then I convinced myself that you just turn back into a jerk, which you weren't. And now your going to marry Stacey. And that's good. That's…that's great! But I just…I just….I just wanted you to know that…that…I'm sorry. And that I love you. I always have. I always will,ever since we first met. And I want you to know that I always will. I will never stop loving you. And if you read this, and your afraid that I'm going to ruin your wedding, don't worry. I'm not going to be a prat anymore. I'm not going to interfere. I'm just going to be on the sidelines, waiting in the wings. Waiting if you need me, or if you change your mind. And I guess that's it. Wow! That felt unbelievably amazing to get off my chest. I cant believe I admitted that I love James Potter! I love James Potter! I LOVE JAMES POTTER! Oh shi-

-Lily

**So did you like? Please review! Any comments appreciated, good/bad, tell me! I'm dying to know!**


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